Mind the (sympathy) Gap

I went back to work today, limping, with crutch ensconsed under left armpit. Greeted with expressions of concern each time I passed a desk, I stopped each time to explain my absence and my hobbleage. Inexplicably, my explanation was greeted with guffaws, giggling, tears, snot and general merriment. When these beasts had picked themselves off the floor and wiped their poor watery eyes, the question was always "How much had you had?"
Bloody cheek.
(Much improved graphic)
It is no surprise that at least two of my team still have a picture of me falling off a bike as their screensaver.