Read out inane pointless stories sent in by listeners that always seem to finish before anything has happened;
Treat all listeners as if they are over 75;
The empire upon which the sun never sets is still there;
Regurgitate stuff that has been around on the internet for years, that some old codger has found after they were shown how to use the computer at the library. The lists will invariably have been copied down by hand off the screen before being posted to the BBC;
Talk over all records;
Start a new record 30 seconds before the news, but then fade it almost straightaway in order to get in some more inane chatter;
Quote endlessly and directly from the Daily Mail in a horrified way as if any if it were true;
Name drop as often as possible;
Make the occasional iffy comment, usually to do with foreigners or people from the colonies.
See? Easy isn't it?
11 comments:
I used to listen to R4 and the World Service non-stop.
Now I listen to LBC 97.3
I NEVER listen to music radio because John Peel is dead and the chances of hearing a piece of music (shies awaay from using the word, 'record') that I actually want to hear is super-minimal.
Have you tried your local BBC station? At least you get to hear a different idiot.
PLUS you get the chance to phone in and tell them how stupid they are.
Have a read of Digital Spy - the ultimate site for radio foamers such as, ahem, myself.
Wogan pissed you off, then?
Also; I would have thought Sarah Kennedy was to blame, but shurely you're not up *that* early? ;)
Omally. It's NOT Wogan. And yes I am up early;-)
Up as in out of bed, or are you being a grubby little urchin again?
Hahaha SUPERB!!! Although you forgot to add: 'Wait at least 5 silent seconds after a record has ended and then say what it was' :0]
You could gradually turn the volume down, then crank it back up and watch everyone all jump!
Have you caught the new 6.30 R4 comedy 'Listen Against'? It's good. Especially for the non sequitors.
I hate the racist middle class god botherer with a passion and on my truck driving days I have to listen to Radio 4 between 6 and 7-30, so that my karma stays calm. In fact the bestest time for me is when Johnny Walker is standing in for Wogan.
The bestest radio is on in the evenings on R2.
Dogga forgot to mention "I won't insult your inteligence by telling you who that was"
Hooray! I agree! Sarah Kennedy is absolutely crap, for precisely all the reasons you've listed.
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