Complicated

Hi. My name’s Owen. This is my 6th Birthday (Apparently it is 6 days since I was birthed). I went to the pub for the first time tonight. There were lots of people there, some of whom I met for the first time as well. My sister was there. She is very loud and everybody keeps asking her to “sit down” and “don’t climb on there”. She is very pretty. My brother was there too, but my mummy isn’t his mummy, but my daddy is his daddy. Then there were some bigger people: My Auntie, who is my mummy’s and my uncle’s sister, but they haven’t got the same daddy, and her mummy (my grandma) were there. My grandma is the mummy of my mummy, and my uncle, and my auntie, and she used to be married to my granddad, who was there too. He is my mummy’s and my uncle’s daddy, but not my auntie’s daddy. Grandma lives a long way away in a place called Suffolk. She came down to us in a big car. I think I have been in a car, but I didn’t open my eyes. This is granddad,s blog, so you know who he is. And then there was another grandma, called Mellie, but she isn’t my mummy’s mummy at all, or my daddy’s, but I have seen her loads already. She took me to the fair. So it looks like I have 3 grandmas (my daddy has a mummy too, but she wasn’t there), and at least one grandad, but I hear there may be others.
I have learnt to count to three, so I can count me, and my sister and my brother; my uncles and aunties; my grandmas; and my granddads. I haven’t learnt about things called Great Aunties or cousins. May be next week. And there is only one mummy and daddy.